December 31, 2014

"For a child has been born for us, a son given to us; authority rests upon his shoulders; and he is named Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace." Isaiah 9:6

"But we have this treasure in clay jars, so that it may be made clear that this extraordinary power belongs to God and does not come from us." 2 Corinthians 4: 7

"But the Advocate, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you everything, and remind you of all that I have said to you.  Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you.  I do not give to you as the world gives.  Do not let your hearts be troubled, and do not let them be afraid."  John 14: 26-27


God's abundance and my emptiness are a perfect match.  I have been designed to have no sufficiency of my own.  God created me as a jar of clay, set apart for sacred use.  God is peacefully present in my soul regardless of how I feel.  When I don't feel His presence, I fill my emptiness up with things other than God which leaves me feeling even more empty.  God has an abundant supply of everything I need to be at peace in my soul with my daily activities and my struggles.  I live my days trying to be sufficient on my own doing.  Then, at the end of the day, that sufficiency runs short and I am left feeling like a failure.  This puts me in a dark place which pulls me away from God's presence.  It is a crazy roller coaster ride that costs too many tickets without the thrill of the ride.

I picture Jesus, sitting on a bench, waiting....for me.  Sometimes it feels if I don't do it "right" then it is not worth doing at all.  When I think having a relationship with Jesus has to be done "right," I just picture him chuckling and saying, "Silly girl, come sit with me for awhile...just you.  You don't have to do anything special, just be with me."  Can it really be that simple?  I tend to complicate things in my life that don't need to be complicated.

Simplicity.  Jesus, can you help me find that?  Simplicity in my vocation as a wife and mother.  I want complicated to have no place in my life.  Where do I start?  Prayer.  That sounds like a good place.  Draw me to you in the mornings to talk to you and I know you will give me the answers for everything else.  I love you.

Amen